Be A Parent

Violence in school: The victim

Who is the victim of violence at school? Nobody in particular ... There is no specific reason for a child to become a victim.

Everything and its opposite can unfortunately lead to this status. Sometimes a simple physical difference, such as being overweight, mediocre academic results, or conversely very good, is enough to trigger hostilities.

Of course, all "different" children will not be subjected to violence. It is agreed to admit that this child will present, at some point in his life, certain frailties that will suggest to others, and especially to the stalker, that the "different" child may be bored, harassed ...

It goes without saying that it is out of the question to blame the victim for this violence!


In recent years a few violent incidents involving the deaths of the children concerned have been publicized and have left their mark. The attacks with a knife or knife, the blows resulting in death by haemorrhage, in the playgrounds, queuing in the canteen, in front of the gate of the establishment, are episodes that should never have had place.

One can consider (wrongly?) That the type of violence is not the same when it comes to "just" insults since physical violence has an immediate dramatic effect.

However, both (physical and psychological) violence can have tragic consequences, because if the harassment is not going to directly result in bodily trauma, it can do so indirectly.

Psychological violence at school

Children end up living in such an unbearable climate of anxiety that they can harm their own lives. Sometimes, we come to extreme consequences ... In recent years, cases of suicide of very young children (in primary) have upset public opinion.

Sometimes the two combine: a child is taken as a target and will suffer "small" physical violence, not necessarily resulting in injury, such as pats on the head, or toes.

Conclusion: there is no "little violence", because in the end the goal is to show his ancestry on another person and to humiliate him.

Signs that must alert

It must be remembered that a child suffering violence will not necessarily manifest it at home. Sometimes, so as not to worry his parents, and often because there is an almost palpable border between family life and school. As if events on one side should not transpire on the other, and vice versa.

Many parents say they have not seen anything coming: "Our son was a little distant, but he was always dreamy, we did not think he was taken as a Turk's head."

We must not remain indifferent

However, the best barometer remains the child's attitude. To be summoned several times to school for even trivial facts, must put you in the ear. This does not necessarily augur its status: harassed (or stalker), but it allows to notice a malaise in the child. Similarly, inconsistent school results, an aggression for no apparent reason, towards the family, siblings, hypertrophied sensitivity, sudden phobia (school for example). A change in your friendships, a change in behavior, a need to isolate yourself ... All these signs, everything that comes out of your child's daily routine, must attract your attention.

The solutions

In addition to being alert at certain sensitive moments of the life of his child, communication is a great way to identify a possible malaise. The best is to establish beaches of calm in a family life often accelerated. Only with you, your child will confide more willingly during an improvised lunch, or a movie. Sometimes even confidences may concern another child, it is not forbidden to listen, and then to transmit if necessary, to the people concerned if you feel it is worth it.

Solutions to violence at school
In cases where the child has been harassed and to restore his confidence, the first step is to recognize this violence. If there is a complaint, it will be necessary to ensure that the child learns what the sanctions were for the person who abused him.

A malicious act must be recognized as such and the child must not feel abandoned either by his own family or by the legislative system. As with adults, the child-victim needs to be recognized by society, otherwise he or she will have to understand what is happening and end up finding justification to the unjustifiable.

Then pay attention to the risk of devaluation, depression and potentially suicide. A good psychological follow-up must be put in place so that the child can verbalize his misery, his misunderstanding, all the negative feelings or not, which can cross him.

Finally, if necessary and if it is physically possible, it may be advisable to change the child of establishment. Do not return to the scene of psychological torture, or physical violence can help you overcome the trauma more quickly.

You want to react, to give your testimony or to ask a question? Appointment in our FORUMS Child or Psychology!

Read also :

> When to take your child to a psychiatrist?
> My child is stressed!
> When teenagers crush black

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